things I love about you

Cupid from the archives

Dear Sam,

Here are the first five things that come to my mind that I cherish and adore about you:

1. How you take in so much more than you let on-your depth.

2. How you can complement a friend’s artwork, seconds after they have insulted yours-your generosity.

3. The way every cell in your body works together when a baseball is coming towards you from the mound-your physical intelligence.

4. Your willingness to do something new-your adventuresome spirit.

5. Your forehead under my palm when we cuddle-how you receive love.

Cupid #2-from the archives

Dear Marcel,

Here are the first five things that come to my mind that I cherish and adore about you:

1. How you share whatever is on your mind-your truth.

2. How your hard mood can change so easily with a hug, or an “uppy”-your willingness to let go.

3. The questions. The constant questions-your search for meaning.

4. When you touch me on the nose and say; “I see sunshine right here”-your affection.

5. The way the world revolves around Sam, and then all of your people-your capacity for love.

++++

I am so ridiculously blessed to share this lifetime with you both.

Always, Mama

Classic Mama C and the Boys from the archives

And to all of my readers–thank you for all the love you share with us–the ways you hold and care for us–and the space you create for all of this to happen. To those of you who are waiting for the love (s) you will soon shower your adoration upon–I wish you ease and a moment of peace, that all is exactly as it is meant to be and it will unfold beautifully as it is meant to.

On Not Receiving Flowers

My brother is taking my sons to the store right now to “not buy you flowers Mom”.

Asking family and friends to step in and do the thing (flowers, a mother’s day gift, a card for my birthday) that a partner-husband-wife might do without prompting is not as self serving as it sounds.

I want my boys to understand the expectations around these events, even if I think they are over commercialized and without real thought or meaning to many.  I’ll help them figure that piece out later.  For now I like a bouquet of tulips in the winter, and they love to be part of the “we are going to the store to get rice milk and syrup for breakfast and NOT TO BUY YOU FLOWERS,” conspiracy with Uncle. They get to give back, and we all need that opportunity modeled at times.

They may miss out on things that I can do nothing about. But I do a damn fine job of filling in the blanks when I can, so that the richness of our experience is not about what was missing, but about how to make it happen with what you’ve got.

Thank you to Uncle, and for all of our friends and family for all of the flowers you are not buying.