Photo by Sam.

Disbelief by Mom.

Sam: Mom listen to this.

Me: What, hon. I’m busy.

Sam: Can I have a dollar, I want to buy my girlfriend a beer.

Me: WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

Sam: It worked! I just got you off your dag computer.

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Kids say the darnedest things? Assume all you want, but this sentence has me baffled. It’s not like the kid is sneaking out his window to hang out down at the local pub. Even Uncle couldn’t wrap his head around the origins of this one. (But they did have a boys night while I was at the bridal shower last weekend.) We don’t have television reception to speak of, so its never on. It’s been months since the last time the family went to see a baseball game where the red eyed ones come back from the concession stand gripping a cold one for dear life.

My reaction has sealed our doom though. Now he knows it’s funny and shocking. It’s a matter of time before he’s bringing that one up at daycare, or heaven forbid: the pew. I can just see it now,  when the older woman who fled from us that time is pulling out her money for the offering, my little comedian will say; “Could I borrow one of those dollars? I need to buy my girlfriend a beer.”